Ladies and Gentlemen I present to you...
The Elocution Rhyme

 I'm looking for lessons of a certain sort,
For good tuition, I would report,

To a teacher who could end my plight,
You see I just wanna tork allright.

Dear teacher would you please,
I'm willing to beg, on my knees,

Dont say no, your my only hope,
I'm fed up of speaking like a dope.

Elocution is what I had in mind,
If I persist, I would find,

I would then speak rather posh,
Mix with the elite, oh my gosh.

So what do you say,can you help me out,
Dont worry, you wont have to work for nowt,

Whatever your rate, I would gladly pay,
I am ready and waiting,just name the day.

What about the venue, where will it be,
Do you know of any classrooms free.

Failing that, we could go to a pub,
and speaking posh order beer and some grub.

Is there anyone out there, give us a ring,
I will meet you and I will bring......myself....

Dave.